Step Five: Spilling the Tea
How to put a burden down, y’all — for realz.
Step five: Admitted to Higher Power, ourselves and to another human being, the exact nature of our wrongs.
If you were willing to bank an hour looking at the shit that burdens you, the next step is a relief. You prolly been walking around with resentments, fears, guilt and shame a majority your life. It’s almost like the system is set up to keep us under a dark cloud alone, feeling like we ain’t worth shit (I hear people calling themselves a piece of shit more often than I wanna think about). They saying goes “You only sick as your secrets.”
You wanna get free, you gotta drag that shit out into the light. You gotta find someone in your life you can trust enough to share everything on that list and to talk through the who, what, where, when and why of all of it. It’s not enough just to rattle off a list of random items. You gotta be willing to share where you think a lot of this stuff comes from. Talk about how you learned to think the way you think. You gotta understand how it’s done served you and why it ain’t serving you no more.
You ain’t gotta be like my ass and write a damn book on it. I do shit big like that. I’m mah fugging Notorious Pink, after all. Imagine a life where you ain’t had to worry about what mah fuggahs might find out about your ass? Take all the “worst” things about you and turn them into something useful to other mah fuggahs. That’s some high ass frigging aspirations anybody, but the mah fugging payoff o’ that shit priceless AF.
Most people wanna tell somebody sworn keep they shit secret, like a priest or a therapist. That’s cool if you got that support. Not everybody do. Some gonna have to settle a trusted friend. Whoever you tell, make sure they know what’s cool to share and what you want kept in confidence. Don’t stress too much. Most people understand the honor telling them your “inventory” and probably know they’d look pretty shitty telling the world about it.
You ain’t gotta do it all in one shot either. You can share a little at a time and you can share different things with different people. The important thing is to get it all off your chest.
